Pickem Dash Football

We are official now. I guess I have something to do during the offseason now. Until then, follow my stuff on http://www.theferm.org/ .

The End. It's sad. I'm staring at the blinking cursor again. *sigh* I guess you guys are getting my farewell in whatever-English-teacher-calls-it-when-you-are-just-supposed-to-keep-writing style. This is as sad as a one-stringed violin's song. And I'm not talking metaphorically here. Can you hear that? No? That's because the one-stringed violin's one string just broke. Seriously Sad. Blinking cursor. That lady is sad too... but it's because her one stringed violin sucks. Just look at it! How about celebrating this year's winners before the presentation of the last award? NCAA Pick'em Contest: 1st Place ($106): Chris , 59.2% ATS, 132 pts 2nd Place-tie ($21.25): Amy/Carrie , 57% ATS, 127 pts 2nd Place-tie ($21.25): Curtis , 57% ATS, 127 pts NFL Pick'em Contest: 1st Place ($106): Chris , 66% SU, 169 pts 2nd Place ($42.50): Me , 64.8% SU, 166 pts Overall Pick'em Points: 1st Place (pride): Chris , 301 pts 2nd Place: Amy/Carrie , 290 pts NCAA Bowl ...

He doesn't call for his name to be up in lights, This just gives him something to do fall weekday nights. His game gets you buzzin quicker than vodka ‘n juice, And offseason brings you down like alcohol abuse. His weekly card often makes the weak uneasy, And he’s also got rhymes that in no way are cheesy. So don’t dismiss him 'cause he writes really white raps. He’s not selling this skill these are simple facts. So while another trophy in the gallery is just more a formality, His Pickem game is all about reality, and not about the salary. His game is nine years in the makin, out from under the robe, And with the blog you can read this *bleep* all over the globe. His job is 26 percent knowledge, and 38 percent skill. He asks for 14 percent help, and runs on 70 percent thrill. When he get 35 percent peeved, he drinks 9 percent beer. But that’s 192 percent reason for him to want to be here. Pick'em08 Commissioner of the Year And the Pickie goes to... Greg. Whoa! Sweet! This aw...

While I hate that we always have some attrition, my favorite part of the league is that for every couple guys we lose, we have a couple newbies come in. It's even better when the rookies seem a perfect fit for the core group of pickers. Crystal should have probably received a Lifetime Achievement Award Pickie for recruiting, but both of our Pickem'08 rookies came through other pipelines. Pick'em08 Rookie of the Year And the award goes to... Rich. Going in to the very last week of the NFL contest, our two rookies Justin and Rich, were tied for 7th in the overall standings. Justin picked a respectable 12 of 16, but Rich picked 14 correct and edged him in the overall standings by two. Rich then went on to rookie victory with a super bowl day comeback win in the NFL Playoff Contest. Congrats newbs.

I could not pass this fake awards show off without an "in memoriam" segment. For each of our fallen pick'em homies, I ask that you hold your applause (why do people clap at a picture of someone who just died anyway?) until the end of the email. If you are drinking while you are reading this email, you can pour a little out for those that you miss most. Off-Season Passings: RP - Randy Parsons, aka, uhh, Randy : Randy took his picks seriously, and seemed to be a very busy dude. I even took his picks via cell phone a few times last year. But alas, he couldn't deal with the stress of 30 picks a week and he left us peacefully. DD - Dean Decker, aka "The Wrecking Crew" : Self proclaimed Jimmy "The Greek" (?), potential aggie (?), Bob's Carrier colleague (*check*)... I don't know much about Dean, but he claims Bob as a friend, so that is something in my book. Peace out little buddy. DP - David Polyansky, aka "The Flying Toros" : In doing...

(hit play up above for some theme music as you read this post) Michael Myers was straight up scary. If you don't remember... rent, download, stream, or purchase a copy of any Halloween movie but Halloween III (wtf!?). Dude doesn't speak... and dude doesn't die. He is relentless. He doesn't always win, but he never gives up... and he's a pretty darn scary too. If you haven't guessed it yet, this award is given to the scariest team. The Michael Myers Award And the Pickie goes to... Amy & Carrie. “The Doublemint Twins” turned into “The Deuce” this year and were as potent as ever. They finished 2nd overall and competed for wins in almost every contest. Is that scary enough for you? How about I never wrote a question or dealt out any points without pondering what kind of backlash I would get from these two. Heck, I’m scared they won’t appreciate the amusing award I’m handing off here.

I'm aware that this league slants a bit toward the college game, but I'm not sure if it's the slant that influences the league talk or the college game itself that creates the type of fans that would join this league. Nevertheless (how did that ever become a word? itisjustthreewordswithnospaces!), I enjoy sharing the roller coaster that is the college football season that we all go through pulling for our respective schools (except zero-u talk... thanks for taking care of that Kyle). This award celebrates the person most devoted to their school's football team. I'm not talking about just bleeding orange, purple, whatever sand aggies bleed (black?), or crimson. I'm not talking about breaking a wicker chair when your team loses. I'm not even talking about drinking yourself into a coma mid-game to numb the pain of a potentially unfavorable outcome. I'm talking about forfeiting bonus points to avoid jinxing your team's chances at a championship y'all...