Monday, January 11, 2010

2009 National Championship - Not Yo Momma's BCS Game

I somehow never managed to write anything on the Bowl Challenge posts for the championship game. Of course on Thursday night I was preoccupied, but the fact is I hadn't wrote anything on the GMAC Bowl the day before either. Dave locked up the contest the night before the BCS Championship and quite frankly, I didn't know what to put for my thoughts on the game... still don't.

It's known 'round these parts that I'm a Longhorn and things didn't go the way I wanted them to go on January 7th. The championship game was certainly no 2006 Rose Bowl nor was it even the Tebow/Bradford slug-fest (emphasis on slugs) from 2009. What we were given was a game where Saban looked mortal, McCoy's arm was deactivated, and neither offense did jack bleep for the majority of the game. To top it off, in my household, the ladies went down before the game to a violent sort of stomach virus. For a good part of the game I found myself looking for interesting places to set down my beer en route to "holding hair" (that's teamwork my friends). By the end of the game, everyone was asleep.

Between the hair holding, drinking, and reluctant game watching, sometime mid-game I started texting Kirby about Texas' offensive woes. I was emotionally down, nearing six beers deep. In the absence of, in my opinion, the one player that was the most valuable to his team in college football this year, Texas was done. Make no mistake, I think Texas' offensive coordinator called a terrible game in McCoy's absence, and the offensive line coach should be shown the door for years of incompetence.

But it is what it is.

If by chance friends or family of young Garrett Gilbert find their way to this site, understand the following has nothing to do with the kid... these are like "your momma" jokes, only about how much Gilbert sucks... and it was damn therapeutic y'all. Just sayin'.

G: Gilbert is the suckiest suck that ever sucked

G: Gilbert grew up on Suck Road in Suckville

G: Gilbert just called an audible from suck and ran suckier

G: Gilbert went to Vegas and doubled down on suck

K: After Gilbert crapped out

G: Gilbert will suck just to hook up strangers with crack

G: Gilbert prefers drinks with straws, for obvious reasons

K: Despite his awful throws, I heard Gilbert tosses a good salad

G: Gilbert likes vampire movies

K: I heard they named a vacuum after him

K: I heard he had his ribs removed

G: Gilbert has the Chief's field goal kicker on his fantasy team

G: Gilbert and the refs grew up on the same street

G: Gilbert actually completely disappears when standing near Greg Davis' black hole of suck

G: I've Gilbert'ed down a lot of beer this game (note: Red Hook ESB, 2 Magic Hat #9's, 3 Dale's Pale Ales at this point)

G: Gilbert blows Gabriel's horn

G: Gilbert's favorite movie is "Blow"

G: Gilbert's favorite band is Hootie

K: Gilbert likes lollipops

K: (note: off topic, but funny) Colt apparently doesn't know the saying: "Jesus don't tap"

K: I bought an aquarium today and it came with two little fish called Gilberts that stick to the glass and keep it clean

K: My dental hygienist is very generous with the Gilbert so I don't choke on my own spit

G: The TV spin-off "Joey" became Facebook friends with Gilbert after the game

G: The Raiders already have Gilbert on their draft board

Friday, January 8, 2010

2009 Bowl Pick'em Challenge - Official Post (Post-New Years Games)

1/1/10 8:05 PM Update: I'm still playing catch up from my New Year's excursions. Here goes nothing...

Don't forget to relive all 34 games by rereading the pre-Xmas games and pre-New Year's games.

Click to enlarge. Last updated 1/7/10 11:09 PM.

1/1/10 8:10 PM Update: In an attempt to catch up, I'm condensing the posts for today's games.

1/1/10 11:23 PM Leader Board Update

: Outback Bowl - Tampa, FL - Raymond James Stadium
Score: Northwestern - 35, Auburn - 38 OT
Current Points Leader: JHa, I Will Beat Bob and Gary - 210 (breaking KZ's 6 game streak... but only by 1)
Current Statistical Leader: KS, DonkeyStyle

Game: Konica Minota Gator Bowl - Jacksonville, FL - Jacksonville Municipal Stadium
Score: (16) West Virginia - 21, Florida St. - 33
Current Points Leader: KZ, Suck it #15 - 218 (back on top after a 1 game break)
Current Statistical Leader: KZ, Suck it #15

Game: Capital One Bowl - Orlando, FL - Florida Citrus Bowl
Score: (13) Penn St. - 19, (12) LSU - 17
Current Points Leader: KZ, Suck it #15 - 218 (back on top after a 1 game break)
Current Statistical Leader: KS, DonkeyStyle

Game: Rose Bowl Game presented by Citi - Pasadena, CA - Rose Bowl
Score: (8) Ohio St. - 26, (7) Oregon - 17
Current Points Leader: KZ, Suck it #15 - 218
Current Statistical Leader: KH, Mr. Smokey Pants

Game: Allstate Sugar Bowl - New Orleans, LA - Superdome
Score: (5) Florida - 51 , (3) Cincinnati -24
Current Points Leader: KZ, Suck it #15 - 256
Current Statistical Leader: KH, Mr. Smokey Pants

Collective Game Thoughts: (placeholder, in case I have any)

Collective Beverage Thoughts: (placeholder, in case I have any)

1/1/10 10:15 PM Update: Hold up... Tebow cam?!? C'mon Fox.

1/2/10 2:23 PM Leader Board Update
: International Bowl - Toronto, Canada - Rogers Centre
Score: South Florida - 27, No. Illinois - 3
Current Points Leader: JHa, I Will Beat Bob and Gary - 264
Current Statistical Leader: KH, Mr. Smokey Pants
Game Thoughts: The best part about this game was the story about the players needing passports... and all the Doug Flutie talk... not so much the actual game.
Beverage Thoughts: You know what's good? Dr. Pepper.

1/2/10 4:58 PM Leader Board Update
: Bowl - Birmingham, AL - Legion Field
Score: South Carolina - 7, UConn - 20
Current Points Leader: KZ, Suck it #15 - 275
Current Statistical Leader: KH, Mr. Smokey Pants
Game Thoughts: I didn't watch this terrible game, but I guess it answers what happens when you match up a decent team in a crappy conference with a crappy team in the SEC.
Beverage Thoughts: You know what's not good? Papa John's pizza. What the hell happened? They used to make pretty good pizza. They prided themselves on fresh ingredients. I think it's time to admit they've changed the "formula" several times by dialing the quality notch down to the Gatti level.

1/2/10 5:06 PM Leader Board Update
: AT&T Cotton Bowl - Dallas, TX - Cotton Bowl
Score: (19) Okie St. - 7, Ole Miss - 21
Current Points Leader: KZ, Suck it #15 - 291
Current Statistical Leader: KH, Mr. Smokey Pants
Game Thoughts: So let me get this straight, the "Cotton Bowl" isn't played in the Cotton Bowl stadium anymore, but the Cotton Bowl stadium still hosts games. One thing that became more obvious then where you look to find the clock in Jerryworld was that no one wanted to win this game. I also noticed it was a battle of two QBs that garner a lot of media hype but mostly dissappoint. This game was so frigging boring that Daryl Johnston (color analyst) yelled after an incompletion in the 4th quarter of the 7-7 game: "Somebody make a play already!!" Whoops.
Daryl Johnston yelled “somebody make a play already!!” He later followed with “I don’t know if anyone wants to win the Cotton Bowl this year.” Apparently Ole Miss won. I lost interest with several minutes remaining.
Beverage Thoughts: I wish I would have been drinking for this game. It was not for the sober.

1/2/10 11:22 PM Leader Board Update
: Autozone Liberty Bowl - Philadelphia, PA - Liberty Bowl Memorial Stadium
Score: Arkansas - 20, East Carolina - 17
Current Points Leader: KZ, Suck it #15 - 304
Current Statistical Leader: KH, Mr. Smokey Pants
Game Thoughts: Sportscenter tells me that the East Carolina kicker pretty much blew this game. 2 missed FGs near the end of regulation and one in OT (he was 1-5 overall). He's lucky he's not a Colombian soccer player.
Beverage Thoughts: During my drunken Central Market run chronicled on my New Year's Eve game entries, I picked up a sixer of Real Ale's Phoenixx Double ESB. I was especially excited 1.) Because was focused enough to discover it on the shelves and 2.) I thought this was a draught only beer. This is an Americanized version of a traditional British style beer (double = more malt, higher ABV; more hops). ESB's are usually boring to me, but this offering is very good. The toffee and caramel notes are complimented nicely by the prominent, but not overbearing, hops. Pick this up folks... It's a winter seasonal... just make sure to drink it fast.

1/3/10 12:09 PM Leader Board Update
: Valero Alamo Bowl - San Antonio, TX - Alamodome
Score: Michigan St. - 31, Texas Tech - 41
Current Points Leader: DW, Bevo XIV - 337
Current Statistical Leader: KH, Mr. Smokey Pants
Game Thoughts: The constant coverage of James-gate got pretty annoying. Also, was it me or was this game not interesting until near the end. Finally, Ruffin McNeil seems like a good freaking dude. I'd have him in my living room. Oliver is a pretty chunky dude, even if he's only 18 months.
Beverage Thoughts: My Dad's wine cooler is getting kind of full. Luckily his wine purchasing has overwhelmed his ability to store or drink his stock (seriously guys, I think that semi-custom cooler he has holds 1000+). During my last visit he handed me a bottle of '05 Havens Merlot. If names of grapes don't mean anything to you, Merlots are pretty solid red wines, but typically mature early and are more middle of the road in flavor than most wines that I like. In other words, there are a lot of pedestrian Merlots in my opinion. But despite being several sentences in to this thought, I want my Havens story to be about the time I visited the winery. First of all, our reservation was at like 10AM or something... sweet. It was private... super sweet. And, it wasn't long after founder Michael Havens had sold the place to "the big boys," whoever that is. The best part was after the tasting I kind of wandered off to take random pictures and when I was around back taking grape vine pictures, I heard Biggie's "Mo' Money, Mo' Problems" booming from inside the work-floor area of the winery. Awesome. (**hint, they just sold out... get it?**). Sadly, Havens shut the doors for good this year. I'm going to miss this Merlot. Fk.

1/4/10 11:13 PM Leader Board Update
: Tostitos Fiesta Bowl - Glendale, AZ - University of Phoenix Stadium
Score: (6) Boise St. - 17, (4) TCU - 10
Current Points Leader: DW, Bevo XIV - 341
Current Statistical Leader: KZ, Suck It #15 (edited scorecard for mistake 1/5 3:11PM)
Game Thoughts: If I had a nickel for every crowd shot of a Boise or TCU fan flashing the "we're #1" hand signal... I'd at least be able to pay off that busted virtual bet I made on TCU -7. But speaking of camera work, I made up a drinking game during the Fiesta Bowl. Every time they showed a TCU girl, you must drink (if anyone played this game, they wouldn't be able to go into work tomorrow). I may be biased because I bet TCU, but they really sucked this game. Where was their high powered offense and defense? TCU fan may point to the D, but seriously, Boise's "O" was sht too. Just a few final thoughts: 1.) Thank you BCS for matching these teams together... people b!tched, but it was a good choice and the game proved it, and 2.) Neither of these teams can complain about being left out of the big show... just sayin'... but I would have liked to see both lose in the first round of a playoff.
Beverage Thoughts: Tonight I made a roasted red pepper and bacon pasta sauce. The best part about this sauce, aside from the 6 slices of bacon, is that it calls for 2 tablespoons of red wine. 2 freaking tablespoons... awesome. It's the perfect excuse to open a bottle, and while it's Monday, I decided to open up a Tuesday wine. "Tuesday wines," if you don't remember, are good quality but value priced wines. As far as I know, my parents made up this term for the wines that they open when it's not Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, or a special occasion (you can stop laughing now). My selection today was actually the wine I most associate with the phrase "Tuesday wine," because it was the one my parents opened when I first heard them use it. Tonight's wine is a Newton Claret (red label, '07) from Napa County. The wine is $16.78 (cash) at Specs, but this wine easily tastes like a mid-20s wine. A Claret is a Bordeaux blend, and for those that are interested, check out more at wikipedia. For those that are looking to get me a present, Bordeaux blends are my favorite wines... just please send something that isn't a Tuesday wine.

1/5/10 3:30 PM Update - Bowl Challenge Potential Outcomes

Games Remaining
: Orange Bowl - (10) Iowa vs (9) GA Tech, GMAC Bowl - Central Michigan vs. Troy, BCS Championship - (2) Texas vs. (1) Alabama

I have run all of the possible scenarios and here are the following paths to victory.

DW wins if
: Iowa wins and either C. Mich OR Texas win.
KZ wins if
: Troy wins and either 'Bama OR GA Tech win.
KH wins if
: GA Tech & C. Mich win... then Kirby can sit back and enjoy the BCS Championship game, b/c he'll already have the Bowl Challenge championship locked up.

1/5/10 10:34 PM Leader Board Update
: FedEx Orange Bowl - Miami, FL - Dolphin Stadium
Score: (10) Iowa - 24, (9) Georgia Tech - 14
Current Points Leader: DW, Bevo XIV - 344
Current Statistical Leader: DW, Bevo XIV
Game Thoughts: Holy cr@p! How much sh!t football do I have to watch this bowl season. First of all, it was one of the most boring Jan 1 days that I can remember, and now day after day we get games where neither team want to win. Fk, at least in the Florida game they came out and flexed their muscles. Is it possible that most college football games suck and the fact 437 of them are on TV every Saturday, which makes up for the bad games?
Beverage Thoughts: Tonight was a Crown (Reserve) & Coke night. Possibly a little pedestrian to a few of you, but it is pretty delicious. Crown & Coke is like a Tuesday cocktail... maybe. Here's a little copy/paste of my thoughts on this drink from our "Name Your Drink" bonus question:
Crown Royal and Coke may be the most drinkable liquor cocktail that doesn't come with an umbrella. I love this choice, and have accidentally emptied entire bottles of Crown Royal Special Reserve with this magical concoction. I mean, once you open a Coke, you can't stop before the can is empty. That is wasting a good Coke, and there are thirsty kids in China.

1/6/10 10:08 PM Update: DW, Bevo XIV WINS THE BOWL CHALLENGE!! Have fun in Pasadena. Don't read this.

1/8/10 3:27 PM Update: My bad on the lack of updates. Dave's locking up of the game and the upcoming championship game gave me the excuses I needed to procrastinate. Catching up though... here we go.

1/8/10 3:28 PM Leader Board Update (late update)
: GMAC Bowl - Mobile, AL - Ladd Peebles Stadium
Score: Central Michigan - 44, Troy - 41
Current Points Leader: DW, Bevo XIV - 355
Current Statistical Leader: DW, Bevo XIV
Game Thoughts: This was actually a good game. In my opinion, we went on a good game drought from the Dec 30th Roady's Humanitarian Bowl to this oddly scheduled GMAC Bowl. But, the most important part of this game was that Dave locked up the contest championship. Interestingly enough, given 'Bama's win in the big game, Kimsey would have won if Troy had pulled it this one out then she would have won the Bowl Challenge.
Beverage Thoughts: I'm going to make this short. Delirium Tremens. If you don't know you betta aks somebody.

1/11/10 2:07 PM Leader Board Update (late update)
: Citi BCS National Championship Game - Pasadena, CA - Rose Bowl
Score: (2) Texas - 21, (1) Alabama - 37
Current Points Leader: DW, Bevo XIV - 355
Current Statistical Leader: DW, Bevo XIV

Tuesday, January 5, 2010

Week 18 NFL Bonus – New Year’s Resolution

Last NFL card of '09... last card of NFL Pick'em 09.

Answer convention:
Game Initials, Team Name – Resolution
My comments
Bonus Points (0-4 points available)

KZ, Suck It #15
to pick better next year. oh, and to lose a couple lbs. before our trip to the bvi's, i've been hitting the budweiser pretty hard this football season.
I probably won't be the first to tell you, "it must be rough."
+4 points

KH, Mr. Smokey Pants
Go to more Longhorn games!
If that means more post-gates and old school rap gazebo parties then I support that resolution.
+4 points

KW, Dallas D-Bags
Go pay the 'donation' for participation in this most excellent pick em league.
Max points for the "most excellent" part.
+4 points

CC, Dallas Novacain
Go To regain my pick'em mojo before next season starts.
+4 points

DW, Bevo XIV
None for me, thanks.
Bonus points? Or Resolutions?
+2 points

AN, The MotherLoad
Follow an all beer all the time diet to lose weight : -) The key is to drink only really good beer with high alcohol so you pass out and don't eat. If the level is too low you get the munchies. I have it all worked out : -)
Uhhhh… brilliant!!
+4 points

A-C, Amy/Carrie's Team
Hmmmmm, good question.
I know, that is why I wrote it.
+2 points

GN, Ferments-A-Lot
Drink mo' betta beer... make mo' betta picks.
Equals mo' betta football seasons.
+4 points

JC, Justin's Team
Drink Make better pickem picks.
I know, that was why it was part of my resolution.
+4 points

KS, DonkeyStyle
I will never bench my starters when I can achieve perfection.
Signed, Wes Welker.
+4 points

RK, BlitzKrieg
I Stop making half-ass picks from my phone at 5 til game time… AND I was a bit hasty with the previous resolution. My new year's resolution is to figure out a way to lock Craig James in a dark closet for good. I'll make room in there for Millen as well.
If I could give you 12 points, I would have.
+4 points

Monday, January 4, 2010

BCS National Championship - Texas Longhorns vs. Alabama Crimson Tide


if 'Bama fan has one of these, let me know and I'll post it.

Sunday, January 3, 2010