P-F15: NFL Playoff Pick'em Challenge, Part 1

There are* times in all of our lives when we need a new beginning. Maybe you failed to place in a regular season contest. Perhaps you let your mind drift when you saw that monster of a bowl card. Now you feel far from a master picker. Previous disappointments may have caused you to drift from picking. You need a new beginning.

But is it even possible? And if it is, where do you start? The thought of a new beginning is scary, because you don't want to risk another pick'em failure.

But you aren't content. Your soul needs to pick. You could make the difficult and perilous journey to the promise land, OR you could just click a few boxes and wager some points! Because. You. Are. A. Human. Being.

Forget Babylon. It is a pile of rubble. How about couch and computer. You earned this chance by joining at the beginning of the season. Follow me now.

* I had a college English teacher in college that failed our papers if we started a sentence with "there are" or "there is." Well BAM -- look at me now!

Click on the picks below to make it bigger. Depending on your browser, you may also need to right click and "view image" to be able to zoom.

updated 1/24/16 8:54 PM CST

P-F15: Week 13 Bonus - Pick'em Dash Football's Turkey Leg Awards

Pee Wee Sperman	Plan B pill because we all know NFL players need to stop popping out kids	OK. One leg to Plan B.	+3
The Guru	On a personal note, a shout out to my wife for completing a half marathon!	One turkey leg to The Guru's wife.	+3
A Northmen	Turkey Leg to Johnny Football for keeping out of trouble and staying first string....oh wait..what...never mind. Turkey Leg to the Comish for getting the card out on time (yup, not against brown nosing)	One browned turkey leg.	+3
Gig'em
chicainery
Beelzebubbles	Mine goes to the man who created the 99 Grand Parkway. I know it wasnt a woman because the road is super curvy!!	One turkey leg to super curvy women. No turkey legs to converting roads to toll.	+4
15 National Championships	Turkey leg to JFB for being the largest jackass to ever step on the football field.	Johnny Incognito gets a 2nd turkey leg.	+3
Bey	Kubiak. Just because.	Ugh. OK. One turkey leg to Kubes.	+3
Tannesaurus Rex	Browns head coach for overreacting. :)	Turkey legs to all (new franchise) Browns head coaches!	+4
Cactie
Double D
Swamp Dawgs	Les Miles. You have to give props to a man who can get fired and take $15 million with him	Turkey leg to that goofy mf'er, Les Miles.	+3
DirtBurglars	Turkey legs for the turkeys in congress	One turkey leg for Congress. They can figure out how to get it served.	+3
Bevo XIV RIP	Turkey Leg Award goes to the best lip syncing artist during the Macy's Day parade	A turkey leg to the sound guy.	+3
Left Hand Scissors
Pimp Possee	Anything	A turkey leg to you, sir.	+1
The Velvet Neutral Ground	My turkey leg award goes to Johnny Football aka Johnny Used Car Salesman. With a side of douche gravy.	Johnny likes legs.	+3
Lost Cause	Tony Romo and Dez Bryant back together and turning the Cowboys around!	A turkey leg to lost causes.	+4
Naked Bootleggers
Bill F*cking O'Brien's Juice is Loose	The Commish, nuff said	I love turkey legs	+3
I got nothing	Beer. Always the MVP	Turkey legs and beer.	+4
Home Team Confusers	Fallout 4	Turkey leg to "where did the day go?"	+3
Geaux JJ
Brownie Points
Peyton's Ponies	the turkey themselves, by allowing us to use this day and bird as not only an excellent meal but also as a symbol to get together with family and friends and hang out together and bring back old times. Also I'm sure the turkey would be pumped to get it's leg back.	A turkey leg for your answer too.	+5
AccidentChild	The Donald!	Turkeys for turkeys	+3
SayMyName
BlitzKrieg	Pickem commish for taking time out to score all of this stuff. Seriously, I have trouble finding the time to respond to simple, open-ended bonus questions with (presumably) no wrong answer.	Since there is no wrong answer, I will take that turkey leg.	+3
Alexandria Cyclones	6-pack of Genesee Cream Ale	It's like gravy to the turkey leg.	+3

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P-F15: Week 11 NFL Bonus - Tell Me Something Good

Totally open-ended bonus question. Tell me something good.

Pee Wee Sperman	a blowjob from your best friend's hot mom...	OK. I wouldn't know, but I suppose that could be pretty good… if you were a teenager. I'm not really into my friend's moms anymore	+3
The Guru	Angry Tom Brady on my fantasy football team	An angry Tom Brady is good.	+4
A Northmen	There is enough DNA in an average person's body to stretch from the sun to Pluto 17 times....little known fact ;-)	Nerd.	+4
Gig'em	Only 2 weeks til Thanksgiving!	That woulda been good to read back then.	+3
chicainery	My wife had our baby last night. If that's not worth the full bonus, I don't know what would be!	Pictures or it didn't happen.	+6
Beelzebubbles	I have stopped fighting the battle of the bulge and decided to embrace my inner and outer chubby girl and love me for me. Fat is where its at yo!	Loving yourself is super good.	+5
15 National Championships	Well, the Aggies are a dumpster fire. And so are the Texans and Saints. But... BAMA is still keeping things interesting for this kid and... I get to be a full on fat ass in about two weeks.	That's all good, except the Texans part.	+4
Bey	Levain Bakery cookies. Delicious.	Cookies are really good.	+4
Tannesaurus Rex	The mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell.	I guess that is good.	+4
Cactie		Not good.	+0
Double D		Not good at all.	+0
Swamp Dawgs	If this presidential thing ends up Trump vs Clinton I have options: A. Kill my DirectTV subscription B. Move to Sweden and assume another name C. Wait for the Trump vs Clinton special election cage match on TNT Which do I do?	The answer is D (D?), all of the above.	+4
DirtBurglars	Free beer!	Free beer is the best kind of beer. Free sushi on the other hand, beware.	+4
Bevo XIV RIP	Over under on wins to win the AFC South: 6.5	Over is good.	+3
Left Hand Scissors		Not so good.	+0
Pimp Possee	Tell me something good...ah baby baby baby ahhh! http://youtu.be/SW06XaXk8dw	Yessir.	+6
The Velvet Neutral Ground	We're one step closer to never, ever having to stop drinking alcohol. http://www.cnn.com/2015/11/11/health/wearable-artificial-kidney-dialysis-study/index.html	Good gracious.	+5
Lost Cause	Christmas is about a month and a half away!!	Naughty or good?	+3
Naked Bootleggers	The Norris legacy will continue as my wife is having a boy!	Congrats. And what a legacy it has been.	+4
Bill F*cking O'Brien's Juice is Loose	I'm every woman	I can read your thoughts right now, every one from A to Z	+3
I got nothing	You know what's good? BEER	You know what's gooder? Free beer. (see above)	+3
Home Team Confusers	....Oooh Baby baby baby yeeeaaahhhhh...oooohh, oh, tell me tell me tell......	You know that's good. Original version good.	+5
Geaux JJ		Not good.	+0
Brownie Points		Also not good.	+0
Peyton's Ponies	-Thanksgiving right around the corner with stuffing and turkey and pumpkin pie. -Also the surprise divide in the NFL standings, either you're really good or you're not. Not sure if that is a good thing or not but all well it's interesting.	All good.	+4
AccidentChild	Cowboys when romo is back	Nope, still not that good.	+3
SayMyName	Brisket and Beer	So stinking good.	+5
BlitzKrieg		Less good.	+0
Alexandria Cyclones	It's a nice day outside.	Always good.	+3