Thursday, September 12, 2019

P-F19: Should NFL Picks Be Against the Spread? (Week 2 NFL Bonus)

Despite James Madison's warning of "the tyranny of the majority," I'm okay with most decisions here being majority rule. In our recruitment form this year, I let you vote on changing NFL picks from straight up to against the spread. As a way of documenting the reasons why we do what we do around here, I also gave you the forum to defend your position.

However like our democracy here in the United States, or should I say republic, you probably need your commissioner to clarify and validate your opinions.

Below are the official commissioner interpretations of what your answer sounded like.

Almost no one wanted to switch the NFL contest to against the spread. Why not?


I voted for lines. Rest of the league is soft. - BlitzKrieg (RK)
This sounds like you aren't interested in some of the solid arguments that are going to follow.

I did don’t blame me - Too much pressure to come up with a name quickly (KS)
This sounds a little defensive sir, so I DO BLAME YOU.

Cause i suck At picking lines lol I sick at picking in general so easier the better for me. - Crigga88 (CR)
This is a common and honest answer of the people. You work hard, and the last thing you want to do is study up on what skill player of the week has new assault charges filed against him.

Vegas is too good. NFL pickems would turn into a coin flip. - Gigem! (AP)
This is as solid of an opinion on the topic as it gets. You may think we've exhausted the opinions of both sides at this point. I could shut it down right here, but unlike an LSU defender, I'm going to through the fatigue.

Because the line is controlled by the Mob. - Big Papa (AM)
This sounds similar to the "everyone else is doing it" argument. I watched the Sopranos, and some of the mob are good people.

Can't figure out all those pluses and minuses - Dirt Burglars (DT)
Gambling is mostly minuses. Don't be scared.

I wanted to, ain't skeered. - 17 National Championships (CG) & More Challenges (ANe)
Little known fact, skeer in Dutch is slang for being broke. I ain't skeer twice a month, but that's about it.

Makes the overall contest more difficult. Maybe pick against the spread in NFL and use O/U for college? - Gary 'wii mis yu' Francis (RH)
First off, referencing OG P-F player Gary Francis AND using Garynese in your team name is baller. Well done. However, that answer sounds like a way to make Pick'em less fun.

Too much math. - The Texans don’t need a GM (CK)
That's what spreadsheets are for.

Cause it's hard enough to pick 'em straight! - Cornholio's Bunghole (BO)
It's not as simple as just picking straight though. Pick'em is more of a spectrum these days.

Because most of them live with their mothers and don't like to challenge themselves in life! - I Look Good On Top (BF)
This sounds like you need a good hot meal and a hug.

Because I hate change, you know that, I know that, let's just deal with it! - A Northmen (ANo)
This sounds like my wife.

Too many bad beats, which don't happen on a winner/loser scenario - Bevo XV (DW)
This sounds like a degenerate answer.

Dallas Cowboys suck - Cockypantherfan (SZ)
This sounds like someone who knows the cheat code to easy bonus points in P-F.

WE all had a meeting at a bar and decided we didn't want this because Math is hard - Beelzebubbles (CC)
This sounds like --hold up you guys, is there a Pick'em happy hour that I'm not invited to?

Chickenshit - SoonerTheBetter (BL)
Horseshit, j/k

I’ve never been in the money while playing the spread. - Shake & Baker (JN)
This sounds like a reasonable answer. I think the people are back on track.

Because we missed the Monday Nights Games on this card??? - General Wartz (JM)
This sounds like you're just like me. I missed them too.

I’m not good with numbers. - accidentchild (MN)
I'm going to assume this was an intentional play on words -- and I like it.

Everyday life is against the spread. And life is hard. No one likes hard. - Swampdogs (DR)
...Except the kids at Rice. That's why they play Texas.

Why mess with perfection? - Huntwick Hosers (KW)
It's like you know me.

3 reasons:
A. Lost in a dream. I don't know which way to go
B. I've been a fool before. Wouldn't like to get my love caught in the slammin' door
C. You are so hard to read. You play hide-and-seek; With your true intentions. If you're only playin' games; I'll just have to say...Abb-b-b-bye, b-b-b-bye
- Commodore Nation (KH)
...and Paula Abdul. I friggin read this for daaaays and then had to search the internet for clues. Well played sir. Straight up.

If it ain't broke, don't fix it! - Lost Cause (JH)
Sounds like what they say at the local district energy plant!