Wednesday, September 14, 2011

P-F11: The MNF Abomination

Thanks a lot guys.

This week's bonus question was going to be a good one for me... because it only has one right answer! More games on TV is always better. However, many of you took the paragraph answer format I left to be pretty damned thoughtful and/or funny with your answers. You guys are in mid-season form in Week 2!


Danger Mouse & Daniele Luppi - Two Against One (feat. Jack White)

As a result, instead of handing out 1 point to those of you that got it wrong (KW, RK, CCa, CCo, Lo, A-C, DD, CG, JB, MN, JN, MF, SE, CW, MM, D2, JG, KP) and 2 points to those that got it right (ANo, GN, DW, KH, KZ, KSc, GF, JH, DCo, ANe, SS, KSh GD, AP) I would be remiss if I didn't share some of this stuff (and deal out a few extra points on top of what is stated above). I should have known after Week 1, where Mr. Smokeypants (KH) said the bonus question answers were collectively some of the best the league has ever seen.

For example, last week's NCAA bonus winner The Yeasty Beasties (KW) totally had the wrong answer, but basically said, "put that garbage in another man's face!" Instead of paraphrasing, let me do some copy/pasting:
Peep this, why put us through twice as much crappy commentary? The “Man” totally wants us to buy in to it, but I threw it on the ground, I’m not part of his system. Not to mention, drinking from Thursday night to Monday night hardcore, so let’s double up on the day that’s supposed to be the ramp down for the week. What ev’s.
Whoa, wait a minute. What is this "ramp down" of which you speak? In the mean time, fetch me a double. Here is a +1 point tip.

Crappy commentary? Throwin' Darts (MM) laid down a freaking all time great response:
An abomination? What does a big scary snowman have to do with football. Must be a Ray Nitschke reference from the '67 Ice Bowl. That was certainly the scariest snowman in history.

Inevitable is the more appropriate word for two Monday night football games. For years we had to make due with just one but the question is why? Elementary, my dear Tagliabue, the answer is talent. For years we were limited by the low talent group of Keith Jackson/Frank Gifford, Howard Cosell/Don Meredith. Let's face it, who really wanted to watch these guys? Fortunately, in the last few years we have experienced an influx of talent. When you have Paul Maguire, Robin Roberts, Suzy Kolber, and Dan Fouts as on air talent, you have to take extreme measures. With all this talent, it is no wonder we don't play every game on Monday night........wait a minute, note to self, send letter to commissioner. Who could ever forget Rush Limbaugh's bid to become the next MNF legend, certainly not Donovan McNabb. No folks, it is the wave of the future, every game on Monday night! Soon your Sundays will be free to mow lawns and wash cars. Does anybody have Dennis Miller's number?
I vow to work "Elementary, my dear Tagliabue" into my football watching lexicon. I wish I had more points to give out, but I capped this question at 3 points (and I NEVER change the rules midstream). +2.

Mr. Smokeypants (KH) doesn't mind the commentary, and he appreciates the two games and thinks it should be more than just once a year. Of course, if you know Smokey, you'll know he thinks the "real abomination is the lack of hotties on the sideline mic." If only they could tastefully add boxing ring girls to the broadcasts... or a dedicated 3D cheerleader cam. This is for Smokeypants. I'm just speaking for him.

We had plenty of examples that got it totally wrong, then proceded to work their way toward zero points. Like the worldly Chicainery (CCa), who couldn't stop typing wrong things:
2 games. Who really wants to watch 6+ more hours of football after football all weekend? Either a good game is stolen from Sunday, or a crap game that doesn't need to be featured. Terrible.
I agree with that last part.

The World will always have its fill of brown nosers, and no one does it in P-F bonus answers like Large Donkey IPA (KSc). He probably knows I support the most possible football on my TV and that I have an unnatural contempt for the franchise in Dallas:
MORE FOOTBALL IS NEVER BAD. The is biggest abomination is when they put the F'ing Cowboys on MNF.
Then there is a awesomeness that is Kentucky Wildmen (GF). If you don't like this answer, then you read it wrong. Let me just add, I'm really glad we have our old Gary back. +1 for that.
MNF on cable was a sore spot on me. That means that there is something else on that I will have to fight with my family to watch. At least when it was on ABC, I never had to worry about "I want to watch "x" show on ESPN." F'kin ABC network for making a guys life that much more misserable. It's bad enough that I have to deal with an oversized mouse on prozac, an overstressed duck with a speech impediment, and a mentally retarded dog. You would think that would be enough, BUT NO!!!! Now I have the bachelor!!! You heard of turducken, I wonder what dogduckouse would taste like.
Speaking of sore spots, I didn't know this would strike a cord with the poor:
I was a poor boy growing up in the streets of H-Town. We barely had enough money to afford a 19in television, much less cable. One of the sporting events that kept our family so close during difficult times was MNF. Without that, there's no telling where I'd be now. Growing up to the sweet superlatives of Dan Dierdorf taught me that absolutely everything I come across in life is the "best of all time".

MNF on cable? I think not.

-Hellfish (KSh)
and,
MNF on cable, what do the poor people do? I'll tell you what we do, we go to a rich cousins house...see ya Monday cuz!
-Cacti3 (DCo)
or parents of little ones:
Two MNF games i mean damn man its bad enough i'm forced to drink beer, yell, and cuss on Monday nights but now you'll require me to feel worse about waking my 5 yr old up with the melodious sounds of obscenities even later into the night and push me ever closer into the dangerous realm of "how many is too many since i have to be up at 5:45am" SMH
-WhooDat4Life (Lo) +1
or conservatives:
I don't know what abomination is, sounds like a democrat, and I'm a republican. And so I'm gonna assume its something I don't like, and I don't two games in one night. Yes two games in one night is am Obama nation.
-Beelzebubbles (CCo) +1
or abstainers:
double header = more drinking time
-Diggers (GD)
or people that work late:
Couldn't they have one on Monday and then the other one on Tuesday....some of us have to work and will miss part of the most important game of the week (Pats vs. Dolphins)
-Chumlee's Banditos (KP)
Unless I put in on lock down, and sometimes even if I try, you can sure bet someone will figure out a way not to answer the question. I recall last year when I asked who would score the most this week and Beelzebubbles responded "Me." *sigh*

Dirt Burglers (D2), totally owning the deep history of thieving his state and school pride was built on responded, "There are traditions in the NFL?" Yes, but nothing as great as kiddie horses and repetitive songs. Roughnecks (CW) wondered if "they still play(ed) football on Monday nights". Booyeah! (MN) has a prescriptivist disdain for neologism, or at least that's what Wikipedia tells me. Anyway, he responded with "what is MNF?" OMFG! Finally, Naked Bootleggers (JN) isn't really buying into this whole two game thing, but he thinks the biggest abomination is "the late game being between two of the worst teams in the league".

The most sobering answer to my simple question, with only one correct answer I might add, came from BlitzKrieg (RK).
Neither. Allow me to explain:

As a fan of a team that normally plays in the 1 p.m. Eastern slot on Sundays, I tend to miss at least half of the NFL games a week. I love the idea of moving one of these games to Monday night to create a doubleheader -- I now have the option of seeing one more game a week.

Due to a steady ratings decline over the course of decades, ABC decided it did not want Monday Night Football in its prime time lineup any longer. If the choice is MNF on cable or no MNF at all, I'll take the former. Also, remember that the Sunday night game was created for cable TV. Once ABC decided against MNF, the NFL moved the Sunday night game onto an over-the-air network and made it its featured prime time game of the week. Let's face it -- even Jack Donaghy had to face the realities of cable becoming ubiquitous.
+2, I think next week's question is going to be multiple choice.

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