Tuesday, November 12, 2013

P-F13: Paid in Full (Week 10 NFL Bonus)

16 of the 28 teams have paid. What do I do now?



Thinkin' of a master plan
'Cuz ain't nuthin' but sweat inside my hand

EXCUSES:

Whine about the remaining 12 in every email for the next 3 months? - chicainery (CCa)
I'm not into whining, but +3 for the math (28-16). You were always a good student.

Start an over/under on the remaining members to pay out before the end or the regular season. Gary should be a 15:1 odds to pay out before Jan 1 - 93Bronco (GF)
Finally, a way I could profit off of this pick'em game. Establish a gambli-- oh wait, never mind. +3

The government shutdown my paycheck. - Naked Bootleggers (JN), Inconsistent Losers (ANe)
That is why you pay at the beginning of the season.  JN +3, ANe +8

I don't want to make family holidays awkward with a heated discussion about money on the back patio in front of everyone.
It's hard to imagine something awkward happening at a family holiday get together. +3

If I pay before Sunday can I get the 5 points? I swear I'm good for it. - AccidentChild (MN)
Everyone is good for it, until they aren't. +3

How about I pay now? And my excuse is that I suck. And I get 8 points? - Barrel Aged Donkey (KS)
This was my favorite excuse, but +3



'Cuz I don't like to dream about gettin' paid
So I dig into the books of the rhymes that I made

PUNISHMENTS: 

Who are the twelve that haven't paid... I've probably dated them. - Mrs. Carter's Moves (A-C)
This answer is so great. I didn't know whether to put this in the punishment or excuses section, though :) . +8 either way. 

Last warning, then a) kick them out and b) split up their points 16 ways. - The Northmen (ANo)
Like. +8

Halfway through the season and there are still people who haven't paid. You are a chop if you fall into this category. I feel you should implement a rule that if you haven't paid up by next Sunday, 11/10, you lose one point off your total for both college and the NFL. And one point is deducted until you do pay. That should get some people off their ass and mailing the check. - 15 National Championships (CG)
I thought we were all friends, but now I'm going to call everyone chops. +8

Deduct 5 points from everybody that hasn't paid. Or charge a $5 penalty after this week if they haven't paid. - Mississippi Mudpuppies (DR), Pimp Possee (JB)
A penalty sounds harsh, but I guess it all goes into the winnings pot. +8

5 more points if you've already paid. - The Velvet Neutral Ground (JC)
That's a week's worth of picks sometimes. +8

We should use a percentage of our pot to hire Chet as the official Pick-em league muscle. - BlitzKrieg (RK)


I thought that was what we have 15 National Championships for. +8



ENGINEERS:
Check out this spreadsheet. It would certainly eliminate non-payers forever. - Gig'em! (AP)



AND FINALLY:

all i know is "stache" - Beelzebubbles (CCo) 
And that is all anyone ever has to know ...

Lost Cause (JH)

+infinity

Wednesday, November 6, 2013

P-F13: Week 11 Cards


NCAA Pick'em

NFL Pick'em

P-F13: Lennay Kekua

I'M NOT DEAD!
What a rough pick'em weekend. Both contests saw pretty low scores. Curiously, for the NCAA contest, everyone scored either 6, 7, or 8 with an average of 7. That's about as average as it gets.

The NFL picks averaged 7 correct picks too, but there is bigger news: THE NFL WILL PLAY THE REST OF THE SEASON WITHOUT QUARTERBACKS. But seriously, Vince Young still can't get a job.
The Astrodome died yesterday, because if it can't be turned into a convention center then it obviously can't be turned into anything. Houston has as many convention centers at the Astrodomain property and more in the city than the Aggies and Alabama have fake championships, respectively. What is wrong with people anyway? Who is clamoring to host their convention in the city of Houston?
 
"Howdy, I'm just walking out of my conference at the Astrodome. What do you want to do?"
"You are in for a treat my man. Tons of choices. You can walk 2 miles across the parking lot and see the grass field where Astroworld used to be. OR, you can take a 15 minute walk around the backside and hit Main Street. Watch for homeless people."
"Main Street, that sounds promising."
"Just some apartments and -- I believe -- a Church's Chicken."
"Any bars?"
"Nope."
"Restaurants?"
"There is a Papasitos, Papadeauxs, and a Joe's Crap Shack across the freeway. Just head toward the old Astroworld and hook a right."
"Blast off!!"
I'm just playing, Astrodome fans. At least it'll have Yankee Stadium to keep it company in stadium heaven.
In positive news, we have a new NFL leader. The Velvet Neutral Ground (JC) moved up two spots and leads by one. But I guess that isn't positive for Yahoo Meat Muffins (KP) or Pimp Possee (JB).
Check the leaderboards out for yourselves:
If you want to see how mediocre you did last week, here are those links:
The Week 11 NFL card is coming soon. I won't have any Thursday night games on the NCAA card, but expect some picks to be bonus questions on the NFL card. Also, be thinking of an Astrodome epitaph.
Stay living,
-G